i just want you for my own, more than you could ever know, make my wish come true, all i want for christmas, is you.

i know we've been going through alot, especially this holiday.when i turn away when you were about to hug me.when you needed me the most, all i could do was think of all your faults, when i throw you such strong words, that you won't understand, and that it was your fault that you don't.that i condenm you for your misunderstandings, that nothing about us seems perfect enough for me.that everytime you try to make up with me i just shun you away, and you're always the one accepting my apology.it's never fair, i never seem to be fair to you.that we became so distant because i've been so busy.i've never been sensitive to your feelings.yes i could tell when you get jealous over somone else who's close to me.and that you get affected just thinking of my exhappenings.i couldn't be bothered to reassure you.i wanted to give up so many times, and i did give up so many times.and it just came to me, i've treated the one i love most the worst.

cor told me, on 9th january06, when we were quarreling so bad she asked if i liked you, and i said yes.then she said she didn't feel for me anymore.she may've forgotten but she told me, "i know you'll be together with her.don't be a player anymore, you better be good and faithful to your new girlfriend.cherish her."
and i said okay.i said okay, okay..
i didn't.i didn't keep to any of my words, to almost anybody.


i just wanna say i'm sorry, chess.